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A TOOL-Related Article

Various Blurb Reviews of Opiate

Dates: various, 1992

Transcribed by Mike "Shmoo" Smuland (

Review originally appeared in JERSEY BEAT issue no.47, Fall 1992.
Review written by Tom Brebric, transcribed by Mike "Shmoo" Smuland

Opiate, CD

        A combination of live and studio cuts complete with a parental
advisory sticker which might have to do with a song about rape (with the
line "I want to shoot you in the fuckin' head.")  This music, which deals
with the darker side of things, maintains a certain level of tension, but
never explodes.  Acceptable but not memorable.

[Shmoo's notes:  Oh to be a fanzine writer where opinions are all valid
 and facts are often forgotten.  Horrible review, but interesting.]


Review originally appeared in BLACK MARKET ZINE #10, 1992
Review written by Jam III, transcribed by Mike "Shmoo" Smuland

TOOL           * * * * * .999999ths [out of 6 stars]
Zoo Records

        Fuck Yeah!!  This is it!  This is what I've been waiting for, I
never gave up hope.  I knew something would come along and just blast me 
in the face like this did.  Amongst all the lions being tamed by 
producers saying "Let's record each guitar string on an individual track"
and people trying to overthink and/or read too much into a geographical
grunge theory, Tool comes along with a frontal attack of honest 
ass-thrashing rock n' fucking roll!
        The whole band comes across with such a good feel.  The drums are
great, not just keeping time but powerfully accentuating the movement of 
the music, appropriately!  Bassically the basics are bassically basic [sic],
but tasteful and full of character.  The guitar is furious, when it's not 
slicing into your soul.  It's like a blunt object upside the head, and 
then the vocals are huge!  A big voice belting out some beautifully 
sarcastic lyrics.

[Shmoo's note:  A bit of a fanboy review but he got it a bit more right 
 than the helmet who did the review for Jersey Beat.  Interesting how a
 independent-boy zine like Jersey Beat thought it was too week and a
 full-on death and guts and horror zine such as Black Market thinks it
 is a slice of hard hitting perfection.]


Review orginally appeared in B-Side Magazine, Jun/Jul 92 Issue
Review written by Maureen Odell, transcribed by Mike "Shmoo" Smuland

Opiate (Zoo)

        The ideal recipe:  Take a bit of Jane's Addiction, a touch of
Soundgarden, and mindlessly add massive amounts of anger, aggression, 
passion, violence and power, and you've got the intensely schizophrenic 
sound of LA's own Tool.  Mmm, mmm good!
        Having burned up the local club scene for the last couple of 
years with their furious punk/hardcore flavored assault, Tool is now poised
and ready to bring their beautifully repulsive rage to the masses in the 
form of their debut entitled Opiate.
        Explosive tracks such as `Sweat,' `Hush,' (No, not the Deep Purple
classic) and the bass-o-rama brilliance of `Jerk Off' highlight this 
fierce release of elegant ugliness.  Mmm, mmm good!
        Take a taste of Tool.

[Shmoo's notes:  Sorry that all these reviews suck.  First of all she jumps
in with the band comparison shite (always bad news), then she starts throwing
around big money words like schizophrenic without justifying them.
        And what's with the repetition of this mmm, mmm good crap?  God when
I wrote a review of the Friends sdtk. for a paper and compared it to ice
cream at least I used it as a vehicle of description.  Does Maureen here 
want to eat Tool?  At least to her credit she actually mentioned a few
songs.  Of course to me that's what most of the review should be about.
Notice how reviews that don't break down song by song are all crap?  How
can you describe a band by listening to it once through?  You can, but not
well.  The fac that the writer even used the words hardcore and punk to
describe Tool means she should be shot behind the barn but that's just my
opinion of a crap writer.  I think I'll fly out there and get her job.]

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