page: 04
 title: Tool of Satan
author: 

Maynard James Keenan makes devilish movie debut:

Tool frontman Maynard James Keenan has made his big 
screen acting debut in 'Bikini Bandits', a cult low-budget 
action movie set to hit UK cinemas next month. Keenan 
appears as the Devil.
"He got naked, shaved his ass and covered himself with red 
paint for his first starring role," says director Steve Grasse 
proudly. "You'd think that someone who can sell a million 
records could have got himself into a real movie - what's he 
doing in this piece of shit?
"We were worried about how we were going to get the world's 
coolest rock star from the world's greatest band to be in our 
shitty little movie. But it turns out that Maynard has a 
chocolate fetish, so we sent him tons of Milky Ways, Babe 
Ruths, Snickers, etc... and eventually he caved in. We got our 
man!"
'Bikini Bandits', which also features starring roles for 
Corey 'Stand By Me' Feldman, punk legend Jello Biafra, the 
late Dee Ramone and an impressive number of under-
dressed female hell-raisers, has been described as ' 'Natural 
Born Killers' in a thong' by one impressed US critic. What plot 
there is revolves around four bikini-clad babes finding 
endlessly inventive ways to torment men, while undertaking a 
huge crime spree. Exactly how Keenan's diabolical character 
fits into all this is unclear. We would have asked the man 
himself to answer this question, but he was busy toasting 
tortured souls in the fires of Hades.
'Bikini Bandits' will recieve its UK premiere at an exclusive 
screning in London on October 25, as part of the Raindance 
Film Festival. The screening is to be followed by a swish 
launch party at Soho's Café De Paris, at which Brighton 
hairies The Eighties Matchbox B-Line Disaster will play 
alongside a host of unseasonably-clad lovelies.
Posted to t.d.n: 11/07/02 15:48:43